Once when I was kid I had a dream that I got transported to some island and there was no music of any kind, and when I opened my mouth nothing came out at least in terms of music.When I would try to sing there would be nothing, and forget about trying to play an instrument, it just was not possible...Now to me, that ain't no dream, but a nightmare !!
Right now I'm so sick that I'm feeling like that dream might come true, and I'm very scared, because I don't know what I'd do without my music.
If you've been reading my blog since the beginning, you'll know that my only true dream has been to be a musician. I found the home that I want to be in with the Carpenter Ants, but I now have to be truly realistic and realize that my health is failing, and I just might not be around to get to finish line with them...a frightening thought which I try to push out of my mind, but it keeps creeping back.
I talked with my family Doctor, and she advised me to take 2 months off from work, and maybe we can figure this thing out, so I'm finding strength, and gaining peace with whatever befalls me.
I feel like Lou Gehrig (of the Yankees ) felt when he said "today I consider myself the luckiest man on Earth."
You all know that I'm a fighter, and that I'll find out what's ailing me, and do what I need to do to make myself better, but sometimes it's hard to find that strength, and I have to gain peace with that...take it a day at a time.
I will say this though, if in fact I have to give up being a musician, I am happy because I have had my day in the Sun, and I'm grateful for what time I had, so I'm finding strength, and gaining peace with that.
None-the less, support live music today tomorrow and always.
Monday, May 29, 2006
Saturday, May 13, 2006
Here There and Everywhere
I had to laugh at this e-mail that I received recently from a fan of this blog.It read something similar to, 'Charlie Tee, where the hell have you been? The masses can't move without you, oh guru of home spun wisdom.'...All I can say to that is, if you're taking advice from me, then you really need a shrink.
Don't get me wrong friends, I mean the things that I say here, but really this is my life, my story, and just me dreaming of being...
I deeply appreciate all of your comments and e-mails since I've been away, but truth is I have been really busy on alot of fronts, so I've been here, there and everywhere since you heard from me last, so sit back at your desktop and I'll tell you what's been happening.
Starting off on a slightly somber note, I've been pretty sick. My kidney function has gone down to 29%, and life has been just a bit difficult. I get tired very easily, and I get extremely dehydrated, so I seem to be parched all the time. All the dehydration has caused me to get psoriasis over a good portion of my body (and I'm scratching like a freaking maniac, with no relief).
This has caused my music to suffer a bit, as my bandmates have to watch over me to make sure I'm OK (that's a very uncomfortable, though appreciated stance for me). I just don't feel that I'm giving my all like I normally do, but I press on.
Turning slightly, my daughter Kendra graduated from Nursing School, now here's something to make you proud even if she ain't your kid. She did this while raising 2 small children, and working a full time job.
To say the least I'm extremely proud of her and happy for her, because she gets to choose her life direction. Watch what I'm telling you, she'll be the Oprah Winfrey of Nursing.
The Carpenter Ants just returned from a weeklong road trip, which saw us get our truck robbed and Michael's guitar, Ted's bass, and my gig bag with my saxophone stand and tambourine, and some defunct credit cards, and the words to all of our songs that I've catologued for 13 years get stolen.
It was a hard thing to deal with, but we did and we too pressed on and marched forward.
I guess what this little respid did for me was get me in touch with some things in my life,and like life itself, things have a way of showing their hand here, there, and everywhere.
I'm going to capsulize a good deal of time into this posting, so bear with me here...
Earlier this year (or, the latter part of last year) I told you to stay tuned to the Carpenter Ants, because I felt that we were on the verge of getting someplace with this music, and as things stand right now, I still believe that. Among the reasons that I feel the way that I do is that if you look around you, right now, you'll notice that things in the world are (or at least seem to be) slightly off-center. The war is still looming large in everybody's view, and not just in Iraq, and not just terroism per se' but folks everywhere are starting to feel a great need to have spirituality, mainly because they are feeling their mortality.
It's become so prevalent that even the big rock stars are adding some gospel to their shows (check out Bruce Springsteen's latest CD) in the hopes of getting people to turn to each other, instead of away from each other.
For all of you who can't afford those big rock star prices and you've gone to smaller venues to hear your music, if you think back really hard and long, you'll remember that the Carpenter Ants have played all kinds of music including gospel, and you've been entertained as well as been preached to, all without leaving the comforts of your local barstools.
We've told you for a few years now that "often, there is far less distance between the saints and the sinners, than the sanctimonius would have you believe."
Now that all sounds harsh, but believe me, we're in this alphabet soup together, and the letters are spread out here, there and everywhere.
Fast forward to Saturday May 20th (the date that I started writing this post is above, so you'll get an idea of long I've been away)
Today we were a part of a 10th anniversary celebration, at Toyota of West Virginia.The scarse number of people in attendance spoke volumes to me of how much we are in dire need of spirit.
I'm saying that to say that yes we all are in need of spirituality, but we need to walk this path together, so if you can't afford Rolling Stone prices, start with the Carpenter Ants, you'll still have loads of fun, and a dollar in your pocket.
Get out, here there and everywhere and check out some music. With the stresses of the world, it will be the best drug you can give yourself.
PS. April, I didn't forget you...
Support Live music today tomorrow and always...and thanks for all of your kind comments and e-mails to me during this time. I am a fighter and hopefully I will bounce back from my illness.
Don't get me wrong friends, I mean the things that I say here, but really this is my life, my story, and just me dreaming of being...
I deeply appreciate all of your comments and e-mails since I've been away, but truth is I have been really busy on alot of fronts, so I've been here, there and everywhere since you heard from me last, so sit back at your desktop and I'll tell you what's been happening.
Starting off on a slightly somber note, I've been pretty sick. My kidney function has gone down to 29%, and life has been just a bit difficult. I get tired very easily, and I get extremely dehydrated, so I seem to be parched all the time. All the dehydration has caused me to get psoriasis over a good portion of my body (and I'm scratching like a freaking maniac, with no relief).
This has caused my music to suffer a bit, as my bandmates have to watch over me to make sure I'm OK (that's a very uncomfortable, though appreciated stance for me). I just don't feel that I'm giving my all like I normally do, but I press on.
Turning slightly, my daughter Kendra graduated from Nursing School, now here's something to make you proud even if she ain't your kid. She did this while raising 2 small children, and working a full time job.
To say the least I'm extremely proud of her and happy for her, because she gets to choose her life direction. Watch what I'm telling you, she'll be the Oprah Winfrey of Nursing.
The Carpenter Ants just returned from a weeklong road trip, which saw us get our truck robbed and Michael's guitar, Ted's bass, and my gig bag with my saxophone stand and tambourine, and some defunct credit cards, and the words to all of our songs that I've catologued for 13 years get stolen.
It was a hard thing to deal with, but we did and we too pressed on and marched forward.
I guess what this little respid did for me was get me in touch with some things in my life,and like life itself, things have a way of showing their hand here, there, and everywhere.
I'm going to capsulize a good deal of time into this posting, so bear with me here...
Earlier this year (or, the latter part of last year) I told you to stay tuned to the Carpenter Ants, because I felt that we were on the verge of getting someplace with this music, and as things stand right now, I still believe that. Among the reasons that I feel the way that I do is that if you look around you, right now, you'll notice that things in the world are (or at least seem to be) slightly off-center. The war is still looming large in everybody's view, and not just in Iraq, and not just terroism per se' but folks everywhere are starting to feel a great need to have spirituality, mainly because they are feeling their mortality.
It's become so prevalent that even the big rock stars are adding some gospel to their shows (check out Bruce Springsteen's latest CD) in the hopes of getting people to turn to each other, instead of away from each other.
For all of you who can't afford those big rock star prices and you've gone to smaller venues to hear your music, if you think back really hard and long, you'll remember that the Carpenter Ants have played all kinds of music including gospel, and you've been entertained as well as been preached to, all without leaving the comforts of your local barstools.
We've told you for a few years now that "often, there is far less distance between the saints and the sinners, than the sanctimonius would have you believe."
Now that all sounds harsh, but believe me, we're in this alphabet soup together, and the letters are spread out here, there and everywhere.
Fast forward to Saturday May 20th (the date that I started writing this post is above, so you'll get an idea of long I've been away)
Today we were a part of a 10th anniversary celebration, at Toyota of West Virginia.The scarse number of people in attendance spoke volumes to me of how much we are in dire need of spirit.
I'm saying that to say that yes we all are in need of spirituality, but we need to walk this path together, so if you can't afford Rolling Stone prices, start with the Carpenter Ants, you'll still have loads of fun, and a dollar in your pocket.
Get out, here there and everywhere and check out some music. With the stresses of the world, it will be the best drug you can give yourself.
PS. April, I didn't forget you...
Support Live music today tomorrow and always...and thanks for all of your kind comments and e-mails to me during this time. I am a fighter and hopefully I will bounce back from my illness.
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